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 Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)

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AuthorMessage
Genin

Zehl
Zehl
Male Posts : 18
Ryo : 1002

Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty
PostSubject: Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)   Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) EmptySun May 05, 2013 4:45 pm

Starting Genin Jutsu. (1 E, 3 D)

(I don't need an extra E at the moment.)


E Rank

Name: Weapon Deviate
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: E
Element: Fuuton
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 5m
Duration: 1 post
Cooldown: 2 posts
Description: The user conducts a string of hand seals whilst focussing his/her chakra to the lungs before expelling a small wind gust which will cause kunai to deviate from their initial trajectory by 50cm (half 1m).

D Rank


Name: Fire Style: Smoke Rouge
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: D
Element: Katon
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 10 cubic meters.
Duration:3 Posts.
Cooldown: 4 posts.
Description: The user conducts a string of hand signs before concentrating their chakra to their lungs before expelling a black smoke outward from his lips reaching out 10 cubic meters. The smoke itself disallows vision and obscures light throughout the smoke making it impossible to see within the smoke without a doujutsu. A Fuuton (wind) C rank or higher jutsu can disperse the smoke within a turn.

Name: Talon Barriage
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: D
Element: None
Type: Taijutsu
Range: Self
Duration:One Post.
Cooldown:Two Posts.
Description: This technique involves pure physique and acrobatics, once only a few meters away from their target, the user kicks off the ground in the direction of his opponent whilst spinning forward finding himself upside down in mid-air, once in range the user will bring both legs spinning forward delivering two spinning kicks (one from each leg) to his target, usually aimed at their head or upper torso. This jutsu can cause minor to moderate bruising.

Name: Spinning Pheasant Jutsu
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: D
Element: Katon
Type: Nintaijutsu
Range: Self.
Duration:1 Post
Cooldown:2 Posts
Description:The user needs to be in motion to initiate the jutsu. The user focuses their chakra across one of their elbows transmuting the chakra into flames and begins a spinning motion whilst bending one arm keeping their fist close to their chest. While still in motion the user will strike the intended target with their spinning elbow which can cause minor to moderate bruising and/or first degree burns to the target.


Last edited by Zehl on Tue May 28, 2013 2:14 am; edited 8 times in total
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Oujoukage

Eden
Eden
Female Posts : 2298
Ryo : 1597319

Character sheet
Chakra:
Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Left_bar_bleue500/500Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty_bar_bleue  (500/500)

Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)   Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) EmptyMon May 06, 2013 7:45 pm

The academy jutsu in the database are free. Henge, Bunshin, and Kawarimi are auto free so add those to your jutsu list. Please make 2 custom E-rank jutsu.

Also, in Flame Flicker Jutsu, the phrase "victim may receive first degree burns" needs to state that the first degree burns are minor to moderate at best.
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Genin

Zehl
Zehl
Male Posts : 18
Ryo : 1002

Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)   Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) EmptySun May 19, 2013 3:18 pm

Bump. I re-edited some jutsu hopefully all is well.
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Genin

Kenta Saitama
Kenta Saitama
Male Posts : 303
Ryo : 145652

Character sheet
Chakra:
Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Left_bar_bleue100/100Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty_bar_bleue  (100/100)

Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)   Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) EmptySun May 26, 2013 9:06 am

Weapon Deviate:
Please refrain from putting "Instant" where "1 post" should be. Edit again please.

Your fire style jutsu's cooldown is going to have to be upped by one more post since you have a 3 post duration. Also, I don't see where the Katon affinity comes into this jutsu but that's all.
As for the 10 cubic meters bit. Is that only length wise or in diameter? Clarify please.

Talon Barrage
So...you jump off the ground in the air? or at your opponent? which you then proceed to flip and turn before delivering a blow of two kicks?
Please state that is does minor to moderate bruising and the cooldown to two posts.

Spinning Pheasant Jutsu
So this is basically saying that, you make a patch of chakra form around your elbow before spinning on the spot(?) and as you do so, your Katon affinity kicks in? Please state how long it takes for the katon to begin and clarify the brusing and burns. Both being Minor to Moderate damage.
Also the cooldown should be changed to 2 posts.


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Genin

Kenta Saitama
Kenta Saitama
Male Posts : 303
Ryo : 145652

Character sheet
Chakra:
Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Left_bar_bleue100/100Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty_bar_bleue  (100/100)

Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)   Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) EmptySun May 26, 2013 12:41 pm

OKay doke. Approved unless otherwise told so.
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Oujoukage

Eden
Eden
Female Posts : 2298
Ryo : 1597319

Character sheet
Chakra:
Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Left_bar_bleue500/500Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty_bar_bleue  (500/500)

Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)   Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) EmptySun May 26, 2013 6:25 pm

Fire Style: Smoke Rouge - This still needs to be specified in the description that the smoke is spewed only outward from the user, unless this is not the case.

Everything else looks okay on my end.
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Oujoukage

Eden
Eden
Female Posts : 2298
Ryo : 1597319

Character sheet
Chakra:
Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Left_bar_bleue500/500Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty_bar_bleue  (500/500)

Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)   Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) EmptyTue May 28, 2013 2:17 am

APPROVED!

Make sure you put these approved jutsu in a separate topic in the "Jutsu List" area.
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PostSubject: Re: Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration)   Kano, Zehl (Jutsu Registration) Empty

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