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 Renga Zakii Technique Registration

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AuthorMessage
Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyWed Dec 07, 2011 11:23 pm

Then three punches within a second will suffice. 10 seconds total time. What kind of damage are you wanting it to do?
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyThu Dec 08, 2011 3:03 pm

Edited
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyFri Dec 09, 2011 12:00 am

According to your video, it also thrusts the user back. Add how far back they are thrown, and what their body can slam through.
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Seinin

Haru
Haru
Male Posts : 644
Ryo : 9600

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue300/300Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (300/300)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyFri Dec 09, 2011 12:46 am

The user or the victim? Can be pushed back about 10 feet and cant be slammed through anything, but can make a big ass dent in a wall
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyFri Dec 09, 2011 1:03 am

Victim sorry. Edit that in please and bump
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptySat Dec 10, 2011 12:30 am

Quote :
Name: Berserker Style: Gatling Fists
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: A
Element: N/A
Type: Taijutsu
Range: Close
Description: One post charge. After a charge, the user sends chakra into their arms to increase punching speed, making them able to fire off over three punches in a second for ten seconds total. The force of the punches are light in comparison to other taijutsu techniques, having only the power to bruise skin, muscle, and bone but makes up for it in sheer amount of hits that can be laid. If hit multiple times in the same spots, bone can fracture or break. Internal organs can rupture. Disorientation is also common if a hit is laid to the head. The more hits laid, the further back the target is pushed up to 35 yards. If a wall or other obstacle is in the way, a large dent, up to three feet deep can be formed from the slamming into it. Cool down of 6 posts.

Edited


Last edited by Renga Zakii on Sun Dec 11, 2011 3:47 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptySat Dec 10, 2011 1:45 am

I still need the max distance the victim is thrust back good sir.
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Seinin

Haru
Haru
Male Posts : 644
Ryo : 9600

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue300/300Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (300/300)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptySat Dec 10, 2011 1:53 am

10 feet... edited
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptySat Dec 10, 2011 1:56 am

Once again, just like I mentioned in your Wolf Topic. A Rank is about pummeling the living shit out of your opponent, and potentially killing them. 10 ft. is D rank power. Try more along the lines of 35 yards.
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptySat Dec 10, 2011 4:39 am

Well then, lets bring that shit
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptySat Dec 10, 2011 1:59 pm

Ok, the last few edits are this.....Take out the 4x speed. You have it set in stone that you punch three times within a second. Change it to charge time equal to handseals. After that I will either price, or is this your free A Rank for being clanless?
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Genin

Neji Hitogumo
Neji Hitogumo
Female Posts : 637
Ryo : 800

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue260/260Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (260/260)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptySat Dec 10, 2011 5:35 pm

Its free because of being clanless, but could you price it anyway? Ill probably buy it with Haru later
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptySun Dec 11, 2011 12:38 am

10,000 ryo.
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyThu Dec 22, 2011 7:35 pm

These are going to replace the other D Ranks that I registered earlier.

Name: Raiton: Finger Bullets
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: D
Element: Raiton
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 0-15 feet
Description: Continuous charge. Chakra is focused into the index finger tips on both hands. Golf ball sized balls of lightning can be shot from the finger tips at speeds of 15-20mph. Each shot can numb 3" when it contacts human skin. It also leaves first degree burns, scalding their skin and leaving small blisters. Each finger can shoot 3 shots. All the chakra can be focused into one index finger instead of both. This does not increase the damage done, but the size of the ball increases to baseball size and the finger can shoot 6 shots instead of 3. Each blast is about one inch in size, the large ball on the index finger decreasing each time a shot is fired. No cool down.

Name: Doton: Defensive Barrier
Canon/Custom: Canon
Rank: D
Element: Doton
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 4'x6'x1'
Description: Hand seals required. Chakra is sent to the hands, allowing the user to pull a wall of rock from the ground to defend themselves from an on coming attack. The wall itself is 6' tall, 4' wide, and 1' thick. The wall can be broken by 2D 2C 1B 1A and 1S Rank jutsu. Cool down of 2 posts.


Last edited by Renga Zakii on Tue Dec 27, 2011 2:47 am; edited 1 time in total
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyMon Dec 26, 2011 3:02 am

Bump
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyMon Dec 26, 2011 4:00 am

Finger Bullets - Ok. If the jutsu is going to fire multiple, what is the lag time between each? I feel as though your charge time to create one ball, but fire up to six, isn't justifiable, unless the same ball breaks into six smaller. If you use lag time between shots, it would put too much time within your post, which would lead to a form of god mod with time frame. My suggestion here is to model it after my Eagle Clan Luminaire jutsu, where it has no cooldown, but takes a continuous charge to maintain a rapid fire version. Tell me your thoughts, and bump.
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Genin

Hayoa
Hayoa
Male Posts : 230
Ryo : 5100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue100/100Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (100/100)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyMon Dec 26, 2011 4:04 am

Sure, sounds good to me
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyMon Dec 26, 2011 10:34 pm

Then fix the jutsu and bump after you've finished your editing.
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyTue Dec 27, 2011 2:48 am

Quote :
Name: Raiton: Finger Bullets
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: D
Element: Raiton
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 0-15 feet
Description: Continuous charge. Chakra is focused into the index finger tips on both hands. Golf ball sized balls of lightning can be shot from the finger tips at speeds of 15-20mph. Each shot can numb 3" when it contacts human skin. It also leaves first degree burns, scalding their skin and leaving small blisters. Each finger can shoot 3 shots. All the chakra can be focused into one index finger instead of both. This does not increase the damage done, but the size of the ball increases to baseball size and the finger can shoot 6 shots instead of 3. Each blast is about one inch in size, the large ball on the index finger decreasing each time a shot is fired. No cool down.

Edited
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyTue Dec 27, 2011 3:25 am

The number of shots per post, can only be one per index finger and you cant be holding anything while you do it. Mph can be increased to 30 mph.

Another thing, your range is horrible. A shot like this can probably travel up to 50 yards. Your damage is weak, therefore you can have higher range.

Edit and bump.
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyTue Dec 27, 2011 5:10 am

Name: Raiton: Finger Bullets
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: D
Element: Raiton
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: 0-50 yards
Description: Continuous charge. Chakra is focused into the index finger tips on both hands. Golf ball sized balls of lightning can be shot from the finger tips at speeds of 30mph. Each shot can numb 3" when it contacts human skin. It also leaves first degree burns, scalding their skin and leaving small blisters. Each finger can shoot 3 shots. All the chakra can be focused into one index finger instead of both. This does not increase the damage done, but the size of the ball increases to baseball size and the finger can shoot 6 shots instead of 3. Each blast is about one inch in size, the large ball on the index finger decreasing each time a shot is fired. One shot per index finger, per post (2 shots per post total) and the user cannot be holding anything else while the technique is active. No cool down.


Last edited by Renga Zakii on Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:03 am; edited 1 time in total
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyTue Dec 27, 2011 3:27 pm

Fix the range...
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyWed Dec 28, 2011 12:03 am

bump
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Genin

Dominic
Dominic
Male Posts : 5756
Ryo : 12100

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue330/330Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (330/330)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyWed Dec 28, 2011 1:01 am

Do the bullet shots arch to the target, and meet back or do you get to per say 'control' their initial direction when you fire?
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Genin

Renga Zakii
Renga Zakii
Male Posts : 260
Ryo : 350

Character sheet
Chakra:
Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Left_bar_bleue180/180Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty_bar_bleue  (180/180)

Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Renga Zakii Technique Registration   Renga Zakii Technique Registration - Page 2 EmptyWed Dec 28, 2011 3:21 am

Point my finger and shoot was what I was planning
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